Please subscribe to my Youtube page. (It’s free to subscribe.)
I’m trying to reach 1K followers so I can start monetizing my content. Thank you for your support!
Subscribe To My Substack For Only $4 To Get 3 Episodes Per Week
Become a paid subscriber for $4 monthly to listen to the full episode. You’ll get two weekly Nugget episodes on Mondays and Wednesdays and Friday’s full-length advice podcast.
Today’s Nugget
I am getting myself ready to go back on dating apps.
My question here is how could I formulate in a simple - yet not
repulsive - way that I wish to find a partner but I am in no way looking
to live with any potential partner in the future? (I ask for specific
formulations, I am autistic and it helps me to have some sort of
"script" to express certain things).
For context, I have 2 kids (9 & 11) in shared custody. I enjoy my living
situation with 2 other queer adult roommates and my kids (in my own house).
I have to say that I enjoy (and need) very much having my own space and
time alone. I don't want to take on the emotional and mental load that
it takes to share a common life in a common space. I've done it for 13+
year and... been there, done that.
My priority are my kids, my friends and my projects. I would very much
like to meet someone in a romantic way and I'm ready to make some space
for them in my life. I've been reflecting a lot on what my ideal
romantic life would look like and I believe that I am emotionally
available, just that I don't see myself living a more "traditional" life.
So, how could I let them know - if it comes to it - that I seek a
partnership where each of us would have their own space and activities
and we would share time, love, activities but not share a living space
and that we would keep some independence? Without sounding too
unavailable for a real connection and relationship.
ps: I am not looking to date exclusively cis men, I would prefer meeting
other fellow queer people (I am non-binary), but the reality is that
most queer people are looking for ethical non-monogamy and I am not
(mainly because it sound soooooooooo exhausting and most people are not
that emotionally evolved to be good at ENM! Also, my many planets in Leo
prefer to be the main characters of my potential partner's romantic life
). So my "pool" is pretty narrow and with cis men that would not identify as queer.