How To Make Your Dating Profile Stand Out

Updated: Jul 8, 2020

What tips can you give to make our profiles stand out?

In a world where people are swiping faster than they're brain can process an image, the primary goal of your dating profile is to make people stop swiping. You want them to literally cease swiping right and swiping left when they see your face on their phone screen.

How do you do that?


1. Post a primary photo that is well-lit, clear and takes up the entirety of the frame. (See below.)

2. Post a picture with either an eye-catching backdrop or or where you're wearing a bright color.

3. Choose a primary photo that makes YOU catch your breath.

4. DO NOT post a primary picture of you with other people. Real talk: if you're not the hottest one in that picture, you're going to get rejected strictly on principle. Nobody likes to be bait and switched.

Once they've had their curiosity piqued, you want to keep them engaged.


1. Use the space effectively - Avoid greetings and thanking people for reading. Get right to it. Forget describing your dream partner. Forget prattling on about how you're looking for chemistry, spark, laughs, etc. Of course you are. It's time to sell yourself. Focus your summary on who and what you're passions are.

2. Engage immediately - You have a second, maybe two, to capture the attention of potential matches. That first line has to be a unique. I opened my OKCupid profile with a line about living in a convent when I first moved to NYC. Not only was that a great way to get someone to take notice, it was an excellent spring board for messages.

3. Avoid using too many adjectives - At this point, descriptors like adventurous, laid-back, outgoing, etc. are so overused they've become subjective and require qualification. Are you adventurous in the sense that you travel alone to foreign countries or are you adventurous because you use exotic spices on your food? Rather than qualify an adjective and take up space that could be used more effectively, get to the imagery and specific example. Show me how your outgoing, don't tell me.

4. Give people something to talk about - Intro messages and ensuing conversation is difficult for most people. Include things in your profile that can act as an ice breaker. Someone is more likely to message you if they don't have to wrack their brain or overthink what to say. There's one caveat: Understand that anything you mention in your profile is fair game. If you address it in your profile, it's on the table for discussion.